Hill-Wood Blabs Again & Abject Boredom!

November 11, 2011 by   Filed under: Arsenal FC, Transfers

Greetings fellow Gooners!

Yes, it’s that time again, isn’t it?! International break misery has set in and the tabloids are left with literally nothing else to do but find a few new ways to beat Arsenal fans over the head! Worst of all, they seem to be able to find hundreds of old ways to do it too! This situation is not helped when Peter Hill-Wood, the Arsenal equivalent of Prince Phillip, decides it is time to open that ludicrous out of control trap of his!

Speaking on the subject of Robin Van Persie and contract negotiations, he had this to say:

“He doesn’t want to talk about it at the moment and we are not troubling him.

“I think we will approach him near the end of the season. But we obviously hope that he will sign a new contract – I don’t see why he should not. I can’t believe he is unhappy with us.”


Which immediately rings two alarm bells…

1. Why are we “not troubling him” when his contract may actually be more important than qualifying for the Champions League this season?

2. Why would it be so impossible to believe that he could be “unhappy with us” when he is clearly carrying the burden of a major responsibility of the teams success and or failure at the present time and has seen an average of two of our best players leave the club almost every summer for the past 6?

I simply don’t get this! I know we are the most dramatic club in the EPL. I know that we do everything in the most arse about face, difficult and last minute manner that we possibly can, but why aren’t we simply putting a club record breaking contract in front of his nose right now, this very second or even better, yesterday?!

Seriously, 150k per week, a new Bentley and all the half-time oranges he can eat should just about cover it and, let’s be totally honest, a bargain if you consider what a player of his calibre and experience would cost if we had to replace him.

I am not saying that he is irreplaceable, no footballer is as the likes of Sir Alex Ferguson has proven time and time again when clearing out mega-stars at the drop of a hat, but I do believe that the costs and risks associated with replacing a player who has been banging goals in faster than almost anybody on the planet for the past 12 months are desperately long without spending extraordinary amounts of money and, even then, there is no guarantee of succeeding in finding a replacement that “gels”. Why even think about waiting when we already have a player that clearly gels like a MoFo?!!

But the highlight of Hill-Wood’s comments has to be this little gem…

“I think he is a decent fellow. He was quite difficult at Feyenoord, but we have had no trouble with him.”

HAHAHA! Oh my Dennis! If I were Van Persie I would be more than a little hacked off that this Muppet has actually decided that my past, over 7 years in the distant past when I was 20 years old and a very young man rather than just a young man, should be dragged up now. As for having no trouble with him, well, I think that there was a little trouble back in 2005, what with the Dutchman spending a couple of weeks in prison and all that, but again, that is history and it should be allowed to stay where it belongs…In the past.

It is time that Silent Stan decided that “we don’t need his sort” talking to the press any more and wrapped a mighty, magical conversational chastity belt around the old duffers chops!

Bored, bored, BORED!
Ok, I know that we have finally managed to go into an international break with a decent run of form going, a couple of great wins behind us and a feeling that we may not have actually seen the best of this Arsenal squad as yet, which is quite exciting all round really, but I cannot help wondering how many injuries we will pick up this time whilst our players wander off around the world to play in qualifying matches in various competitions.

Terrifying prospect!

But apart from that vague point of interest, I can literally find nothing to alleviate the desperate boredom of these hateful breaks in the footballing calender. I know that many claim that international football is the pinnacle of football and is the basis for the general growth of this wonderful sport and some may even say that without it we would never have seen some of the best talents of the past 20 years playing on our shores and gracing us with their skills.

What a load of old pony, I say!

Take the European Championships, for example. This “glorious” competition is boring because there are only really a handful of all of the European nations that ever actually win it. Look at this map for an idea of what I am talking about:

European Football Championship Winners

See what I mean? All those big white spaces are countries that never have and probably never will win the trophy, EVER! Ok, I know the same could be levelled at the Premiership, La Liga, Serie A and maybe even the Scottish Premier League at a push (!) but I don’t fecking care about that. I love Premiership football because I love Arsenal and I know that, win or lose, come rain or shine they will always be the most consistent part of my life in terms of love and desire. European football at the international level is just plain boring ad has none of the heart of a club side competition.

As demonstrated by the “Winners Map”, the majority of international football is just a meandering path to almost inevitable conclusions. For all the qualifying “drama”, competition “drama” and winning “drama”, how often is there any actual drama in international football? Denmark won the European Championships about 100 years ago, or so it seems, but apart from that the list of winners of that competition reads like this since 1960:

Soviet Union, Spain, Italy, West Germany, Czechoslovakia, West Germany, France, Holland, Denmark, Germany, France, Greece and Spain.

Ok, Greece was a bit of a surprise too, but who really cares anyway?! Did their players suddenly change the face of modern football? Did the country experience a massive upturn in the general desirableness of its league seeing a large influx of major talents wanting to leave the like of Spain and England to go and play there? Did they even go on to use that win as a platform for future development and thus further successes?

Did they arse!

For example, since winning the Euros in 1992 Denmark, with their “Golden Generation” of players, managed to fail to qualify for the next World Cup and fall in the group stages of the next two European Championships.

But surely Greece have faired better?

Nope!

Since winning the 2004 European Championships, with one of the most dire and George Graham-esque styles of play ever seen in modern international football, the Greeks then failed to qualify for the next World Cup, get knocked out in the first round of the 2010 World Cup and got knocked out in the group stage of the European Championships!

In fact, and here is a cracking statistic that demonstrates the utter futility of all international football, Greece have never actually won a single game in the European Championships finals apart from the 4 wins they managed to piece togther whilst winning the damned thing! Even more hilarious, Denmark have only ever won 6 games in the European finals and only managed to win 2 games, yes, read that again just to make sure you got it right, TWO GAMES when WINNING the tournament!!!

OH my Dennis! How can a team be called European Champions when they only actually won two games in the tournament?! Hold on…Quarter final, semi-final, final…Surely that would require three wins at the very least?! But no! There were no quarter finals that year, only two groups of 4 teams, 2 semi-finals and final and, hey presto, you are the “Champions of European International Football!” I think it tells a large part of the story when you consider that the 1992 European Championships were held in Sweden and of the four clubs to qualify for the semi-finals, three of them were Holland, Sweden and Denmark!

Oh, and just in case you forgot, even though football was good enough for the warring nations in World War II on Christmas Day, or so we are told, UN sanctions banning Yugoslavia from taking part in the tournament is the only reason that Denmark even got a free pass to play after not even managing to qualify for the tournament!

Oh please, give me a break! Just not an international one!!!

Jack’s Here Forever!
Young superstar come wonderkid, Jack Wilshere, has announced that he will stay with Arsenal forever! WOO HOO!

“Can I promise I will be at Arsenal for ever? I can promise that, yes.

“I’ve been at the club since I was nine and I’ve learned to love it. From the Patrick Vieira days, to Dennis Bergkamp, Cesc Fabregas, I’ve watched them come through and move on.

“But now there’s a crop of new players, Aaron Ramsey, myself, Kieran Gibbs, hopefully we can really create something special. I love the club and I want to be part of its future.”


Throw in The Ox, Koscielny and Miyaichi and I think we can say that there is a wealth of young talent at the club all over again! You could even throw a quick glance at Theo who seems to be improving with the added competition for places and still only 22 years old!

All that aside, it is great to hear a player in this day and age speaking in those terms. I just hope that we continue to build on the squad we have in the January window so that he can enjoy playing for us as well as do it for the love of the club.

With this in mind, I have decided to put together a “Jack-O-Meter” to, subjectively and without any real knowledge of the players, their mindset, aims or desires, judge where they would come regards the potential longevity of their Arsenal careers!

So, I will look at a particular player each week and make a totally arbitrary decision based upon nothing in particular aside from my own personal wishes, bias and random decisions! This week we will start at the very back of the team and judge “the Pole between the poles” Wojciech Szczesny:

Jack-O-Meter - Wojciech Szczesny

Well, that seems fairly conclusive! Szczesny will be with us for life, or as close to that as a footballer can get!

Oh, you wanted some reasoning behind this judgement?! Ok, how about this…

The young pole was literally nobody when Wenger picked him out of obscurity and gave him a chance to prove himself. He didn’t shower himself in glory at first and, if all truth be told, many Arsenal fans felt that he would be on his way out and that Fabianski would be the “next great thing” between the sticks. Wenger stood by him, told him to knuckle down and, when injuries and fate collided, the young(er) pole took his chance with, dare I say it, indeed I do, both hands!

Since then he has proven himself to be a match-winning, shot-stopping, penalty-saving maniac and, to boot, he spends most of his time away from the pitch roaring like a young Arsenal lion on Twitter! Some of his recent classics include, but are not limited to:

“How can you not get frustrated with decitions [sic] like that going ALWAYS Man Utds way?! Its a clear pen and sending off!”

And who can argue with that?

“Tweeps, what do you think Ashley was aiming for when he took his penalty?”

Quickly followed by:

“Is it a plane? Is it an aeroplane? No, it’s just Ashley throwing Chelsea out of the FA Cup.”

And my personal favourite:

Please continue the “Szczesny to Barcelona” rumours. Makes me laugh everytime I read it. haha”

So, aside from his obvious loyalties to our great club, Manchester United, Chelsea nor Barcelona are not likely to offer him a job any time soon, so that should help us to keep him!

A resounding 100 degrees Gooner, I think that we can all agree! And if you don’t, well, that’s just tough because it’s my Jack-O-Meter!

And on that hot, sticky note I shall leave you.

Come on you Please Don’t Get Injured Whilst Away On Boring International Duty Gooooonnnnneeeerrrrrsssss!

Comments

6 Comments on "Hill-Wood Blabs Again & Abject Boredom!"

  1. Jeremy on Fri, 11th Nov 2011 2:48 pm 

    Wtf is wrong with PHW? He is such a pathetic attention seeker.

    Is it a good time to talk about stalled contract talk? Is he trying to unsettle the squad ahead of a busy Xmas period?

    It is best that he keep his cigar on lips and don’t even utter a single word.

    I suggest Highbury’s faithful get a giant banner of PHW and play him Robbie Williams’ song…. “you said it best…when you said nothing at all’.

  2. Northbanksy on Fri, 11th Nov 2011 2:54 pm 

    …” But we obviously hope that he will sign a new contract – I don’t see why he should not. I can’t believe he is unhappy with us.”

    Hmmmm, now lets see….

    1. Derisory increase in wages offered, compared with other clubs offers.
    2. Refusal to strengthen first team in January transfer window …..
    ….resulting in….
    3. Failure to win any trophies.
    4. Failure to qualify for the Champions League.
    5. Having to suffer the utterings of a prize knob-end like PHW

  3. ArthurTheGooner on Sat, 12th Nov 2011 1:05 am 

    Shaun

    Good piece my friend! The ongoing dilema about PHW’s comments in the media doesn’t justify the silly things he comes up with! Daily Star are probably not a very good source to follow unless he loves cheap women and doesn’t look else where! I have doubts he even said this to be honest, I’m sure he could do better with money he has at his disposal. Anyway that is debating way too deep!

    Jeremy

    We need to calm down here media will eat us at every opportunity let’s stay calm fella 🙂

    Northbanksy……where have you been? Six years is all you have to show your club for?

    Shame on you! 😉

  4. ArthurTheGooner on Sat, 12th Nov 2011 1:12 am 

    If faith is all we have the let it be …. get behind those in Red and White….

    We have improved and momentum is ours lets keep at it!

    PHW is a person who doesn’t follow football very much otherwise he would say something decent enough to be considered an Arsenal Fan! During the summer he said the same thing about Santos:

    ” I have never heard off him” explains it all….but he will do 🙂

    The old fashioned side of him is good for us though he wont sell and that is all we really want from him he bags his money but hey who doesn’t these days!???

  5. ArthurTheGooner on Sat, 12th Nov 2011 1:16 am 

    I hate this fucking International break! Being Polish we lost 0:2 to Italy and that new Citeh invention Balloteli scored when Szczesny was way out his line, just chipped it over his arm length. I tell you it wasn’t a pretty sight!

    I blame it on defenders for both goals we host next years Euros and we a useless!

    Bring on Arsenal I don’t give a monkeys about Internationals!

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